HEART'S DILEMMA.
The house where I am born, where I spent good 20-30 years of my life, WHERE MY HEART IS, is this really not my home? There is a saying in India "beti paraya dhan hoti hai." Which literally translates to "A daughter is a outside/Alien(according to google translate) property". Which means she doesn't belong to her parents house. In our childhood and naive days we didn't care for these phrases. We were like "Oh! This is a quote in Hindi language. Yeah I have heard that." Ignorant little bloobs we were.🙈 In the back of our mind we daughters didn't like this phrase. But either we didn't have a mind to put it to words or we were too busy enjoining our childhood, our parents love and affection that we forgot, they were talking about our future. Indeed. Realization strikes when you are officially at 'Right age'(this concept is a scam I tell you) to get married. The late twenties, when you are out of the effects of the teens, when maturity starts to get you and you start getting maturity. When you are out of your troubled teens and finally feel you belong to your house you love parents and pop they say Hey! you are to be married. Live with a stranger, start a new life. In my mind I am thinking ("I just settled down here, didn't I? Don't throw me out!) Your heart is screaming at you demanding rebellion but your brain intervenes "No! You are all grown up now. Stop behaving like a teenager and fall into place. This happens to everyone why are you making such a big fuss about it?" But your heart knows that your brain is not too happy about this situation either, it's freaking out. "But someone has to behave like a adult amongst both of us. Because who are we kidding if both of us loose it, It will look so mellow-dramatic and some people might even call it overreacting." the brain thinks. Your heart replies "Hey! super intelligent, know it all brain I know about the GIRLS MANUAL TO MARITAL LIFE: ADVANTAGES & DISADVANTAGES. Learnt it by heart you see. (My heart loves sarcasms and puns) Relax! we are not going to throw a tantrum." Your heart starts growing up at this stage.(In it's own sarcastic way😄) Both of them help the face to put a smile on it, even when it wants to cry rivers. It's the age when heart and brain start becoming friends because only they can understand each other. It's the age when you and only you know what is going on with you and no matter how much you explain it other's will always lecture you on the 'Right thing to do.' Society, pressure, age, fertility, eggs yada yada yada!
I know the grass is definitely not greener on the other side. It's the most difficult decision parents have to make in their life. Sending their own children away, by throwing a grand party. Especially parents of single girl child. This phase is not easy for them either. They might be facing the same heart and brain tussle like you.(I wonder how intense their tussle is? 🤔) They expect the same thing that you are expecting from them. 'Understanding'. It hits your father harder I guess. Because he never left his home. He has made a home for you and has to send you away. Your mother has done this migration at least once! It's difficult for her too because she knows how it feels.
Life comes full circle they say. You will also get a chance to experience the wretched other side too.(not that this side is any greener🤷🙄) You will be the one explaining to a troubled mind and soul one day and the tussle of understandings will go on and on. Because trust me no one can explain a girl the logic behind leaving her own beloved home.. NO ONE...
The house where I am born, where I spent good 20-30 years of my life, WHERE MY HEART IS, is this really not my home? There is a saying in India "beti paraya dhan hoti hai." Which literally translates to "A daughter is a outside/Alien(according to google translate) property". Which means she doesn't belong to her parents house. In our childhood and naive days we didn't care for these phrases. We were like "Oh! This is a quote in Hindi language. Yeah I have heard that." Ignorant little bloobs we were.🙈 In the back of our mind we daughters didn't like this phrase. But either we didn't have a mind to put it to words or we were too busy enjoining our childhood, our parents love and affection that we forgot, they were talking about our future. Indeed. Realization strikes when you are officially at 'Right age'(this concept is a scam I tell you) to get married. The late twenties, when you are out of the effects of the teens, when maturity starts to get you and you start getting maturity. When you are out of your troubled teens and finally feel you belong to your house you love parents and pop they say Hey! you are to be married. Live with a stranger, start a new life. In my mind I am thinking ("I just settled down here, didn't I? Don't throw me out!) Your heart is screaming at you demanding rebellion but your brain intervenes "No! You are all grown up now. Stop behaving like a teenager and fall into place. This happens to everyone why are you making such a big fuss about it?" But your heart knows that your brain is not too happy about this situation either, it's freaking out. "But someone has to behave like a adult amongst both of us. Because who are we kidding if both of us loose it, It will look so mellow-dramatic and some people might even call it overreacting." the brain thinks. Your heart replies "Hey! super intelligent, know it all brain I know about the GIRLS MANUAL TO MARITAL LIFE: ADVANTAGES & DISADVANTAGES. Learnt it by heart you see. (My heart loves sarcasms and puns) Relax! we are not going to throw a tantrum." Your heart starts growing up at this stage.(In it's own sarcastic way😄) Both of them help the face to put a smile on it, even when it wants to cry rivers. It's the age when heart and brain start becoming friends because only they can understand each other. It's the age when you and only you know what is going on with you and no matter how much you explain it other's will always lecture you on the 'Right thing to do.' Society, pressure, age, fertility, eggs yada yada yada!
I know the grass is definitely not greener on the other side. It's the most difficult decision parents have to make in their life. Sending their own children away, by throwing a grand party. Especially parents of single girl child. This phase is not easy for them either. They might be facing the same heart and brain tussle like you.(I wonder how intense their tussle is? 🤔) They expect the same thing that you are expecting from them. 'Understanding'. It hits your father harder I guess. Because he never left his home. He has made a home for you and has to send you away. Your mother has done this migration at least once! It's difficult for her too because she knows how it feels.
Life comes full circle they say. You will also get a chance to experience the wretched other side too.(not that this side is any greener🤷🙄) You will be the one explaining to a troubled mind and soul one day and the tussle of understandings will go on and on. Because trust me no one can explain a girl the logic behind leaving her own beloved home.. NO ONE...
<3
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